When I was in grade school, someone in the high school published an “underground” paper (a few mimeographed sheets of typewritten jokes, stories, and badly-drawn cartoons). It was far and away the funniest thing that I had seen up until that point in my life. The name of this paper, of which there was only one issue ever, was “La Mole”. And there was a little mole-like mascot drawn on the letterhead. It was wearing a stetson hat pulled low, and carrying a submachine gun.
I’ve always wanted to create my own underground newspaper to lampoon the surface world, but, well, you know. I don’t think I could ever equal La Mole. Safer not to try.
Early in my professional career, I met a researcher from MIT who told me the story of how the first hamsters were captured and “domesticated” for use as lab animals. Apparently, hamsters were known to be susceptible to a particular disease that humans get but other contemporary lab animals did not, thus making them an important weapon in the war against this disease — a testing vehicle for vaccines and the like, I suppose.
Now, you’d think that acquiring hamsters would just be a matter of going down to the local Hamster Hut and coming back with a few wriggling bags of merchandise, but this was back before the first hamsters had been captured. There were no pet hamsters. Only wild hamsters. And they were very, very wild. Pound for pound, more feared than badgers and more wily than rats. You can’t just dig a hamster out of its burrow. The burrows are too extensive, and hamsters can dig faster than you can. And they’re crafty. The only way to capture them was, apparently, to:
- locate a field rumored to contain hamsters
- dig a deep ditch around the field
- fill the ditch with traps or hamster-grabbing helpers
- excavate the rest of the field
- wait for the hamsters to make a run for it
- wearing huge gloves and gauntlets, scoop up the slowest ones
She gave me a copy of a paper describing the capture of the first hamsters, and I mean every word when I say that it would have made an excellent Indiana Jones movie. If moles are the Kim Philbys of the animal kingdom, hamsters are the Jason Bournes.
So, I have a special place in my heart for moles and hamsters. I also confess a small infatuation with voles, because the name is so fun to say. And, of course, rats, which make excellent pets and which my daughters adore.
What’s your favorite burrowing animal?
Go ahead; don’t be embarrassed if it’s a burrowing owl. We’re all friends here.
